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“A Feast For Crows” Recap/Reaction

Note: For my reviews on the preceding A Song of Ice and Fire books, click here.   Warning: The following contains rampant **SPOILERS**!

Well.  I read this book very quickly, even though it wasn’t nearly as fast-paced or heart-stopping as the one before it, (A Storm of Swords).  The  storylines in A Feast for Crows are not necessarily slow-moving individually, but there are so many of them and so many chapters between each that it seems to take forever to move forward in the story’s timeline.  There aren’t as many surprise reveals or unexpected twists as the other books, and it’s very dark.  Dark wings, dark words.  I counted ten title references in the text, where the narration explicitly described crows feasting on dead human flesh.  Eleven, if you include this line (emphasis added):

This is a time for beasts, Jamie reflected, for lions and wolves and angry dogs, for ravens and carrion crows.

There are also two references to the “Dance of Dragons” song, which alludes to the title of the next book, when half of the main cast of characters will finally be featured again since they didn’t appear in Feast, (and I’m sure there will be some more new ones as well).  At first I was excited about the new points-of-view that were introduced, since they gave insight to aspects of Westeros that we hadn’t seen much of yet, like the Ironborn and Dornish cultures, but by the time I was 263 pages in and still being introduced to new character perspectives, I was leaning more towards frustration that there would now be yet another side-story to wade through before I could get back to an Arya (my favorite) or a Brienne (second-favorite, in this book) chapter.

A basic summary: there are dead bodies everywhere in Westeros, and crows are eating them.  It is gross.

A basic summary: there are dead bodies everywhere in Westeros, and crows are eating them.  It is gross.

There were two characters in this book that provided sort of meta-quotes about reading, which described my own experience while I was devouring the thousand-plus pages in a matter of days.  First, from Sam; (substitute “chapter” for “book” and it fits perfectly):

One more book, he had told himself, then I’ll stop.  One more folio, just one more.  One more page, then I’ll go up and rest and get a bite to eat.  But there was always another page after that one, and another after that, and another book waiting underneath the pile.  I’ll just take a quick peek to see what this one is about, he’d think, and before he knew he would be halfway through it.

Also, Asha’s “nuncle“, Lord Rodrik “The Reader” of the Ten Towers, sounds like a bookworm after my own heart:

Lord Rodrik was seldom seen without a book in hand, be it in the privy, on the deck of his Sea Song, or whilst holding audience.  Asha had oft seen him reading on his high seat beneath the silver scythes.  He would listen to each case as it was laid before him, pronounce his judgment…and read a bit whilst his captain-of-guards went to bring in the next supplicant.

Oldtown

I loved the prologue, which gave us a glimpse of the path to maseter-dom via the group of novices that were featured.  Previous books had mentioned that maesters forged a new link in their chain whenever they mastered a new subject, but I hadn’t really thought about how the process worked or how anyone got started in that pursuit.  I guess I thought that it was an inherited trade craft or aspiration similar to knighthood, but this book revealed that it’s not seen as a prestigious career by many high-born lords, (like Samwell Tarly’s father or Aemon Targaryen’s father).  But it appears that you don’t have to be high-born, or really have any prestigious connections, in order to become a master–theoretically, anyone with the intelligence and aptitude to learn all the required crafts could forge a chain.  Pate, the prologue’s point-of-view character, has tried and failed multiple times over several years to pass the test for his first link, though, and I’m curious how standardized those tests are, because it sounds like different archmaesters might have varying expectations or grading rubrics, and whichever one a novice chooses as a mentor will have a big impact on what knowledge the novice will need to acquire, and to what degree of mastery.  So basically like a graduate advisor approving your thesis.  In fact, the whole chain-forging process that maesters go through sounds like getting multiple Ph. D.s, and who has time for that?  I mean what is the average length of time for novices to successfully complete their chain, and what is the average age at which newly minted maesters go and find a castle to serve in?  It does sound fascinating, though.  If I lived in Westeros I would totally want to try to become a maester, except I don’t think girls are allowed.

But anyway, who was the mysterious stranger (“alchemist,” supposedly) that took the master key from Pate and then erased his memory?  (I thought that he killed him, but then Pate was still alive when Sam got to Oldtown in the last chapter).  My first guess was Jaqen H’gar, because the physical description of his features didn’t match anyone I could think of, but we know “Jaqen” (or whatever his real name is) can alter his appearance, and he was always making a coin “walk across his knuckles” the way the stranger in the prologue does with the promised payment.  Having finished the book and learned more about the practices of the House of Black and White that Jaqen hails from, I think this guess is definitely the best one, because of how he answers when Pate asks, “Who are you?”

“A stranger.  No one.  Truly.”

The House of Black and White serves the Many-Faced God, and the kindly man there explicitly points out to Arya that in Westeros the Many-Faced God is known as the Stranger.  Furthermore, the kindly man is constantly asking Arya who she is, expecting the heartfelt response, “No one.”  So really the only mystery about the stranger in the prologue is, what does he intend to do with the key?  I don’t know, but since the servants of the Many-Faced God are in the business of delivering his “gift” of death, I bet it’s to gain access to some high-profile, corrupt maesters to kill them.

King’s Landing

Cersei drove me crazy in this book.  I’ve never liked her anyway, and she was one of the only characters so far for whom I still had little to no sympathy after getting to see the world from their perspective.  (The other is Theon Greyjoy).  Reading Cersei’s point-of-view chapters just solidified the fact that she is terrible at the game of thrones–paranoid, never seeing the big picture, letting her emotions affect her decisions, unable to cultivate allies, and not even self-aware enough to realize how much she sucks.  I was nearly screaming at the book in my hands when I read the part where she agrees to let the High Septon resurrect the church’s army if he will in turn bless Tommen; what a clearly stupid move for a monarch struggling to maintain control over a kingdom!  Why would you want to allow another force to be created that could oppose your own, when you’re already fighting multiple enemies, and why would you not even pause to think about what could happen if the church opposes any decision or action the crown takes?  I was a bit gleeful when I was proved right and Cersei’s plans backfired on her by the end of the book, but she obviously never saw it coming.  Just look at how proud she was of her stupid, stupid, un-strategic move immediately after making it:

Cersei could not help but smile.  Even her lord father could have done no better.  At a stroke, she had rid King’s Landing of the plague of sparrows, secured Tommen’s blessing, and lessened the crown’s debt by close to a million dragons.  Her heart was soaring as she allowed the High Septon to escort her back to the Hall of Lamps.

The prophecies that haunted Cersei from her childhood were interesting, but it was annoying how they kept being alluded to yet it seemed like it took forever to finally reveal them in their entirety.

“Queen you shall be…until there comes another, younger and more beautiful, to cast you down and take all that you hold dear.”

Obviously Cersei thinks the younger queen is Margaery, but I’m convinced it’s Dany.  (Speaking of Margaery, I’m not sure what I think about her presumed guilt or innocence in her current predicament; I’m willing to believe her marriage to Renly was never consummated because I’m pretty sure Renly and Loras were lovers instead.  The matter of the missing hymen is inconclusive, too, since Cersei specifically mentioned at one point that high-born ladies often lost theirs due to horse-riding rather than marriage beds.  And Grand Maester Pycelle was cut off when he said that he had provided Margaery with Moon Tea, before he could elaborate on who or what she wanted it for.   I would love to get an inside look at the inner schemings of House Tyrell.  Not that it matters too terribly much, since regardless of who wins this temporary struggle for power in King’s Landing, I predict Dany’s going to ride in on a dragon with her bloodriders and Unsullied army and take over anyway.)

  “And when your tears have drowned you, the valonqar shall wrap his hands about your pale white throat and choke the life from you.”

The bit right before this prophecy said that her children will all die, (“gold shall be their crowns and gold their shrouds,”) and it’s later explained that valonqar is High Valyrian for “little brother.”  Cersei is convinced that the “little brother” who’s going to kill her is Tyrion, but the prophecy doesn’t say it’s her little brother.  I mean it could be, but what if it’s Bran Stark?  He’s a little brother, and a potentially very powerful warg.  Or, maybe more likey, Stannis Baratheon?  He’s Robert’s little brother.

Tommen is much less offensive than Joffrey, and  much more stable than little lord Robert Aryn.  He would have the potential to grow up into a decent monarch, if only his mother wasn’t around, (and if there wasn’t already a prophecy that he would die.)  Poor Tommen.  I loved the scenes were Jamie, as a Knight of the Kingsguard, got to act fatherly towards his secret son, but I don’t think that relationship is going to ever get a chance to develop.  I continued to love Jamie in this book though, with his striving to maintain his vows to a dead woman, for honor, and his determination to keep practicing swordplay with his remaining left hand even though he’s continually discouraged by his performance.  I think Jamie’s character arc so far is just fantastic, and I would love it if he somehow meets up with Bran again before the end of the series so the two of them can team up together in an amazing parallel to their first interaction, when they were so black and white.  Bran was a pure innocent little boy, Jamie was a sick sinister man who thought nothing of killing a child for convinience.  And now Bran is a powerful warg, (at least I think so, I haven’t seen him since A Storm of Swords!) and Jamie is acting more and more like a true knight now, keeping promises and defending maidens’ honor and struggling with inner conflict and remorse and rehabilitation with a golden hand.  Here’s the video I made depicting Jamie at the high table at Darry.

The IronBorn:

I like Asha and I’m glad she’s still alive, since I was afraid she might be killed at the kingsmoot.  (The Reader’s warning to her spooked me.)  It was enlightening to get a closer look at Aeron Damphair and the religion of the Drowned god; (that is some hardcore baptism!)  In fact, we got a lot of insight into the Seven this book as well, and I’d like to post an analysis on the various religions in Westeros after I’ve caught up on the series.  The annoying this about Damphair’s chapter perspectives were that they kept hinting at some traumatic memory involving iron gates and his vicious brother Euron, but we never found out what it was.   Maybe it doesn’t matter; we can guess that it’s horrible considering what we learned about Euron and Vicatrion’s third wife.

I’m definitely not a fan of Euron “Crow’s Eye” Greyjoy, and when he sent Victarion on a mission to capture Dany and bring her back as Euron’s bride I laughed, since I am certain that Dany and her dragons can take these guys.  But, I think the Crow’s Eye may have more powers than the ordinary man.

“When I was a boy, I dreamt that I could fly,” he announced.  “When I woke, I couldn’t…or so the maester said.  But what if he lied?”

I think he’s a warg, like Bran.  Bran dreamed about flying when he was in the coma after his fall, and after he woke up his warg skillset was unlocked.  Is his nickname referring to the three-eyed crow, like the one in Bran’s dream, the one that Jojen Meeren refers to?  Has he warged into crows or seagulls or something and “seen” things across the sea that others haven’t?  There’s definitely something going on with him.

Dorne:

The Sand Snakes sound badass!  I wish we got to see more of them.  Even though they’re only barely introduced, my favorite is Nymeria.  First of all, she’s named after the same warrior legend that Arya named her direwolf after.  Second of all, just read this description!  Doesn’t she sound awesome?  I won’t even try to make a picture of her, because the words do a better job of that already than I could:

She appeared suddenly upon a dune, mounted on a golden sand steed with a mane like fine white silk.  Even ahorse, the Lady Nym looked graceful, dressed all in shimmering lilac robes and a great silk cape of cream and copper that lifted at every gust of wind, and made her look as if she might take flight.  Nymeria San was five-and-twenty, and slender as a willow.  Her straight black hair, worn in a long braid bound up with red-gold wire, made a widow’s peak above her dark eyes, just as her father’s had.  With her high cheekbones, full lips, and milk-pale skin, she had all the beauty that her elder sister lacked…

By contrast, I’m very annoyed with the Sand Snake’s cousin, Princess Arianne.  She’s so immature and impatient, and even though it wasn’t what she intended, she is responsible for Myrcella’s injury.  And I think this is a total cop-out:

Prince Oberyn had armed each of his daughters so they need never be defenseless, but Arianne Martell had no weapon but her guile.  And so she smiled and charmed, and asked nothing in return of Cedra, neither word nor nod.

Oh I’m sorry Princess, are you sad that your daddy didn’t make sure you learned how to use a deadly weapon when you were growing up, but all your cousins that were your constant companions did?  Why didn’t you just practice with your cousins, then, if it was something you wanted?!  You’re blaming your father and using him as an excuse for your laziness.  It has been your choice to make a habit of using charm as a weapon instead of wit.  And I do not admire you for it.

Black Brothers:

I love the exhange between Jon Snow and Samwell Tarly, when the new Lord Snow forbids his timid friend from referring to himself as a coward.   And I’m so pleased that Sam’s going to become a maester; it suits him perfectly.  I was a little disappointed that Sam didn’t figure out the baby-swap between Gilly and Dahla’s boys sooner, since I thought it was immediately obvious, but I guess his naivete is part of why he’s so lovable.  I do wonder what threats Jon made to convince Gilly to go along with his plan, and it seems he surely must have told her he would kill her baby instantly if she refused.  Which is so unfair, although not the first time in this series where we’ve seen high-born human life valued above low-born.  There was a great quote from Septon Meribald, (the traveling minister who led Brienne to Saltpans), that relates to this:

“It is being common-born that is dangerous, when the great lords play their game of thrones.”

The baby-swap to protect the identity and life of a high-born child, arranged by none other than Jon Snow, seems like another echo of this cycle of repeating history the same way that Bran’s group hiding in the crypts of Winterfell mirrored the Bard’s tale in A Clash of Kings.  If my theory about Jon’s true parentage is correct, then he is unknowingly arranging a fate for another princely baby similar to his own–to grow up thinking he’s a bastard, because the truth of his identity is too dangerous.  It also faintly echoes a trope that repeated several times during A Feast For Crows, of smallfolk claiming they have a royal lineage.   The undergaoler that Jamie questions in the wake of Tywin’s murder has a story about being descended from a princess.  A Hedge knight is offended that Brienne has never heard of,

Ser Clarence Crabb, I said.  I got his blood in me.”

And an innkeeper that Brienne does business with in Duskendale says,

“You’d never know it t’look at me, but I got me royal blood.  Can you see it?”

I guess the prevalence of low-borns claiming noble ancestry might not be related to the high-born baby swap, though–it could just be a sign of the instability in the kingdom in the wake of war, and illustrate that even the people who aren’t able to play the “game of thrones” are striving for power and prestige above their station.  Of course, two of Robert Baratheon’s bastards also appear in the book, (Mya Stone and Gendry), and neither appears to know or claim their parentage.

Meanwhile, Maester Aemon keeps rambling about a prophecy that he never fully describes, but I’ve marked all those passages because he mentions bits and pieces that will require further analysis at a later date.  (Something to hold me over while I wait for book six to be published).  But this is a great quote from him, that could totally be used to sum up the state of Westeros in the whole series so far:

“Sam, we tremble on the cusp of half-remembered prophecies, of wonders and terrors that no man now living could hope to comprehend…”

I mean that’s the quote I would use in a voice-over if I were making a trailer for this book, and I would play it with images of a dragonglass candle burning and Euron Storm-Crow’s dragon horn for the “wonders” and zombie Catelyn for the “terrors”.

There’s definitely a lot of room for analysis though with the whole “the dragon has three heads” thing, and I’m not sure I trust the maester that met with Sam at the end and appointed himself the task of traveling to assist Dany and become one of the “three heads”.  I don’t really know what I think it means or who it’s all talking about yet but these prophecies are SOMEHOW VERY IMPORTANT to the overall direction of the story, I’m sure.  I’ll put more thought into it after I finish A Dance with Dragons.

House Stark

Sansa is a total gamer now!  I was so irritated with her gullibility in A Game of Thrones, (and it was totally her fault that Ned lost his head because we know now that dumbass Cersei would never have been able to out-mastermind him if Sansa hadn’t walked up and told her everything about his plans.)  But Sansa, who now refers to herself as her undercover name “Alayne,” has definitely learned a lot, and she is smarter and more perceptive and clever in the “game” now than Cersei could ever hope to be.  I have to give begrudging respect to her mentor/captor Littlefinger for being so clever, too, although that doesn’t excuse him from still being a creep and making Sansa kiss him and sit on his lap.

Here’s the video I made of an exasperated Sansa with a fitful Robert Arryn:

Arya continues to be my favorite character, (or is Jon Snow my favorite?  Hard to decide!  But Jon was barely in this book so I’ll say Arya), but I felt like I was being tortured via Arya-chapter-deprivation, because there were so few of her chapters and they were spread so far apart!  Out of desperation I started marking all the places that mentioned the wolves terrorizing the Riverlands as “Arya” sections, since in a way they are, if we can assume that it’s her direwolf leading the pack.  Below is my video of Arya entering the House of White and Black, (it’s better if you watch it with sound!).  All I have to say about her waking up blind at the end of her last chapter is that it had better be a temporary affliction that marks the next phase of her initiation, or I will have to do a little aggressive, Arya-style “needlework” on some inanimate objects to vent my rage.

Just as Arya better not really be blind, Brienne better not really be dead! I’m going to hold on to the belief that she’s still alive, that whatever word she yelled at the end there as they were hanging here was enough to give them pause and save her, (but what one word could do that?  “Winterfell?”)  Like an idiot, I was excited when I realized Brienne was being brought to “lady Stoneheart,” because I thought it would be a happy reunion and that Catelyn would be so glad to hear that her loyal sworn sword was still out there risking everything to find her daughters, but Cat Stark is as stubborn and impulsive in “death” as she was in life.  I had hoped she could be reunited with one or two of her children, or at least have the peace of learning they’re  not all dead like she thought, but she’s just killing everyone, out of spite, so she needs to die, again.

Random Observations:

I don’t remember coming across the term “Westerosi” (to describe people from Westeros) before this book.  Now I just want to try to work it into conversations somehow.

This is a great quote from Asha’s uncle, Rodrik “The Reader”, for the whole “when you play the game of thrones, you lose or you die” thing.  He’s talking about the Greyjoys, but it applies to everyone:

“This dream of kingship is a madness in our blood.”

It’s possible that the Hound is still alive, and a novice at the Quiet Tower.  The Elder Brother claimed that the Hound died in his arms, but the Elder Brother also said that he himself “died” and was reborn at the Quiet Tower, so maybe that is just figurative language.  They acknowledge that they have his horse there.  Two of the three brothers that meet the travelers when they arrive are described as having their faces covered with wool so that only their eyes show; that would certainly hide a half-burned face, and if lots of brothers dress that way a covered face wouldn’t draw attention.  And the novice digging out a grave when they walk by is said to be “bigger than Brienne.”  I hope that’s really the Hound, because I so wanted him to have a chance at redemption, and if he’s dead then he never really got it.  (If it is him, that same description says “from the way he moved, it was plain to see that he was lame,” so like Jamie he would be a once-skilled fighter forced to forge an identity through some other means.)  I didn’t come up with this Hound theory on my own–I have to credit my friend EM for the idea.

I’m very eager to read the next book soon, and finally be “caught up” so I don’t have to worry about avoiding spoilers anymore and I can go browse the fan pages and wikis and see what theories other people have come up with.

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Storm of Emotion over Storm of Swords

*SPOILERS* ahead, of course.  If you want to see my other Song of Ice and Fire posts, click here for Game of Thrones , and here for Clash of Kings.

Oh my goodness.  This book, A Storm of Swords by George R. R. Martin, was intense.  And so exciting!  I feel like I burned through it, even though it still took me about two weeks to finish, because whenever I did sit down to read it was hundreds of pages of non-stop action and roller-coaster emotions at a time.  My goodreads updates feature an overabundance of exclamation points and capital letters.

In the beginning I was excited and thought I was totally prepared for whatever was coming, since I was now a veteran of two whole books in this series.  The prologue featured a plot to kill Mormont by some bad Night’s Watch brothers, and then the Others attacked!  Exciting stuff, but I was ready for Others.  I was like:

pagelady makes an excited, intrigued, and not at all scared face.

Excited, intrigued, and not at all freaked out yet. (But it’s only the prologue…)

As I kept reading, it didn’t take long for me to be completely surprised by the plot, and then shocked over and over again, head-spun, mind-blown, sick with worry, overjoyed with vicarious vengeance, exultant at victories, devastated at defeats, gasping at revelations, and repeatedly squealing “OMG!”  Maybe I should make my own house words, like all the powerful families in Westeros have; instead of “Winter is Coming,” it could be “Plot Twists are Coming.”  I should know this by now.  This series is definitely a thrilling read!

pagelady's sigil, a gray book on a black background with a black "p" on the cover

The newly minted pagelady sigil and house words!

Aside from the non-stop action, I would characterize this book as “the one where everybody grows up”, (except for Rickon who is M.I.A. the entire time.)  Robb “I took her castle and she took my heart” Stark gets married, even though he breaks his promise to marry a Frey in the process, because “he chose the girl’s honor over his own.  Once he deflowered her, he had no other course.”   But he did have a choice, and Tywin Lannister notes that his choice reflects that “Robb Stark is his father’s son.”  Plus, he’s King of the North, and undefeated on the battlefield.  What a guy!  He should live long and prosper!  Yeah right, he’s his father’s son, and his father was basically killed for being such a noble guy!  So yeah, I didn’t see Robb’s death coming at all, although I was suspicious about the Freys and the ones they kept saying couldn’t attend the wedding because they were “off on duty.”  But I thought they were actually off away from the castle and were going to ambush Robb later, I didn’t think they would cut him down so heartlessly and unfairly while he was a guest at their wedding!!  It was such a terrible, inglorious death for someone who deserved so much more!  And Catelyn died in that chapter too, which I wasn’t super sad about since I find her annoying, but it was still awful since she might have allowed herself to be captured if she had realized that she did still have other children alive that she might see again.

pagelady makes a crying face

I was so not prepared for mass killing to break out at that Tully-Frey wedding!

Sansa gets married too, (poor girl)!  At first I thought it would be to the crippled Willas Tyrell, (and she thought it would be to Loras Tyrell, silly girl.  Besides the fact that he’s taken his vows of celibacy to serve in the Kingsguard, there are some pretty strong hints in this book that Loras and Renly were lovers).  Anyway, she ends up having to marry Tyrion instead, which is a shame because it would have been fun to get to see more of Olenna “Queen of Thorns” Tyrell, who spoke so hilariously with lines like, “once the cow’s been milked there’s no squirting the cream back up her udder.”  Sansa finally escapes King’s Landing, but her situation is still pretty miserable, as her rescuer is the creepy (in a rapist kind of way) Petyr Baelish.

“You told me that life was not a song.  That I would learn that one day, to my sorrow.”  She felt tears in her eyes, but whether she wept for Ser Dontos Hollard, for Joff, for Tyrion, or for herself, Sansa could not say.  “Is it all lies, forever and ever, everyone and everything?”

Poor, poor Sansa.  Later, when yet another marriage arrangement is forced on her, you can see just how far away she is now from the innocent and optimistic girl that went south in Game of Thrones.

It is not me she wants her son to marry, it is my claim.  No one will ever marry me for love.

It’s not quite true, because Petyr Baelish seems like he wants to marry her for love–it’s just, it’s for the love he has for her mother, and how much Sansa reminds him of her…it’s creepy.  Stop creeping, Littlefinger!  I’m very worried for Sansa’s future.

pagelady makes a "stop creeping, littlefinger!" face

“You must be very cold. Let me warm you, Sansa. Take off those gloves, give me your hands.” and “I think you might be even more beautiful than your mother was, when she was your age,” said Petyr the creep.

Bran is getting better at controling his warging, and he has the maturity to decide that his group should take the hard trip to the Wall and beyond rather than the potentially easier but potentially deadly strategy of seeking refuge from their neighbors.

Bran realized he was crying.  Stupid baby, he thought at himself.  No matter where he went, to Karhold or White Harbor or Greywater Watch, he’d be a cripple when he got there.  He balled his hands into fists.  “I want to fly,” he told them.  “Please.  Take me to the crow.”

It took them the whole book to get there, but Bran and his posse are on the other side of the Wall now, having gone through the Black Gate (what?!) to meet up with Coldhands (WHO?!)  I can’t wait to see what happens next with him, especially if he starts learning more about how to warg into other creatures, (Hodor?!)

Arya is the one who first pointed out to me this “growing up” theme, because she explicitly mentions that what she’s experienced has aged her.

“I’m bigger than I was.  I’m not a child.”  Children didn’t kill people, and she had.

A mysterious tiny old woman, (perhaps a fabled child of the forest?), picks up on some bad vibes from Arya one night, and calls her a “dark heart”:

“I see you, wolf child.  Blood child.  I thought it was the lord who smelled of death…”  She began to sob, her little body shaking.  “You are cruel to come to my hill, cruel.  I gorged on grief at Summerhall, I need none of yours.  Begone from here, dark heart.  Begone!”

Arya interprets the “smell of death” that the old lady senses as the body count that the young girl has racked up.

Arya was remembering the stableboy at King’s Landing.  After him there’d been that guard whose throat she cut at Harrenhal, and Ser Amory’s men at that holdfast by the lake.  She didn’t know if Weese and Chiswyck counted, or the ones who’d died on account of the weasel soup…all of a sudden, she felt very sad.

I went right along with this assumption, although I thought perhaps the old lady sensed that Arya was going to kill someone else soon, but I never for a second thought that Arya herself would be killed!  When I finished the chapter on the Tully-Frey wedding, which ends with Robb and Cat dead, I quickly flipped to the next chapter on Arya (after I finished crying and yelling) because I knew she was right outside the same castle, with the Hound.  I did not expect the Hound to take an axe to her head!

pagelady makes an angry face

“She ran from him as Mycah must have run. His axe took her in the back of the head.”

I was in such a fragile emotional state already, having just witnessed the murders of Robb, his followers, and his mother, having had to resign myself to the fact that these characters do not always get glorious deaths or long lives to reach their potential.  But THIS?!  My FAVORITE CHARACTER, cut down by this shifty warrior who keeps alternating between being sympathetic and being a total jerk?!  Who is now 100% jerk-i-fied because he just killed Arya Stark?!  I was inconsolable.

pagelady is crying hard

Noooooooooooooo, not Arya!

During the next several chapters, I kept having to stop reading temporarily to mourn.

pagelady has thrown the book down and is crying

I can’t…I can’t even…

Initially, I had hoped there was a metaphorical interpretation for “his axe took her int he back of the head,” but it was pretty similar to the description of Catelyn’s death, and I thought this must have been the “smell of death” around Arya the little old lady sensed.

Then, one hundred and seventy three pages later, another Arya p.o.v. chapter popped up!  The Hound had just hit her with the flat of his axe, to knock her out so he could rescue her since she was determined to go into the deathtrap of the castle!  I have to say, well done George R. R. Martin.  I really thought she was dead, for 173 pages!  You got me, sir.  You got me good.

pagelady throws her hands in the air and shouts "wooo-hoo!"

My reaction to discovering that Arya was in fact still alive.

Jon Snow’s “growing up” in this book involves him “becoming a man”, by getting laid.  I was ambivalent about the wildling Ygritte with her “lucky” kissed-by-fire red hair, and I didn’t like how unwilling to compromise she was, but when she died I still got a little choked up.  It’s kind of good that she died, though, so that he doesn’t have that lingering conflict of interest.

pagelady sniffs and tears up over ygritte's dying words, "you know nothing jon snow"

Ygritte’s last words.

And now Jon is the Lord Commander of the Night’s Watch!  I loved all of that, how Samwell really “played the game” to get him elected, how Ghost showed up so he came into the great hall as an imposing figure, how the Old Bear’s raven quorked his approval, too.  Jon will be an excellent leader–look how he held the Wall, with so few men and supplies!  But I wonder if Robb’s will of succession is going to complicate things for him, and how he will deal with Mance and Stannis and, oh yeah, the OTHERS?!  That’s kind of a meta-narrative, though, so we probably won’t see it fully resolved until the last book.  And probably Dany’s dragons will play an essential role in vanquishing the Others, too.  (That reminds me, how cool was it when Sam slayed the Other with the dragonglass dagger?!  Loved it.)

You know, even Jamie Lannister grows up a little in this book.   He’s actually trying to be a good person now that he’s lost his sword hand!  I think maybe most of his evil Lannister-ness was concentrated in that hand, and maybe it has also helped his character to be separated from Cersei for so long.

picture of jamie minus his hand

Jamie himself points out that he’s lost the hand that killed a king and pushed a child out a window.

I absolutely looooove the begrudgingly respectful relationship between Jamie and Brienne of Tarth, especially when he goes back to rescue her from Harrenhall and when he gives her the sword of Valyrian steel and the mission to save Sansa.

“When Ned Stark died, his greatsword was given to the King’s Justice,” he told her.  “But my father felt that such a fine blade was wasted on a mere headsman.  He gave Ser Ilyn a new sword, and had Ice melted down and reforged.  There was enough metal for two new blades.  You’re holding one.  So you’ll be defending Ned Stark’s daughter with Ned Stark’s own steel, if that makes any difference to you.”

Meanwhile, across the sea, Dany is growing more and more confident in her role as Queen.  She was a badass in this book!  When I read the part in Astapoor, where she was going to buy the Unsullied army by selling one of her dragons, I was so mad at her, but then a few pages later I was totally fangirling over the way she dominated those slave traders.

dany appears to be selling the dragon

pagelady makes an exasperated face

Girl, you’d better not sell that dragon!

dany gives a secret command and the dragon attacks the trader with flames

pagelady makes a happy face

AWESOME!!!

Of course, Dany’s victory in Astapoor wasn’t the only moment that I cheered for.  I really liked the way Arya crossed The Tickler’s name off her vengeance list, yelling the same questions that he had used during his torture sessions as she stabbed him.  And I liked how Tyrion finally stood up to and ended his father, the most cold-hearted man (that I’ve met so far) in all of the seven kingdoms.  And of course I was elated that snot-nosed Joffrey finally died.

pagelady happily recalls arya killing the tickler, joffrey dying, and tyrion killing tywin

Is it bad that they’re all moments of people killing other people? Video games don’t make people violent, these BOOKS do!

I was so glad that Joffrey was finally removed from power, but the way it happened had me instantly worried about Tyrion’s chances of survival, so I barely even had time to gloat.  Although, his death WAS totally deserved, especially since we had just learned that it was Joff who sent the dagger to kill Bran in Game of Thrones.

Cersei closed the window.  “Yes, I hoped the boy would die.  So did you.  Even Robert thought that would have been for the best.  ‘We kill our horses when they break a leg, and our dogs when they go blind, but we are too weak to give the same mercy to crippled children,’ he told me.  He was blind himself at the time, from drink.”

Robert?  Jamie had guarded the king long enought to know that Robert Baratheon said things in his cups that he would have denied angrily the next day.  “Were you alone when Robert said this?”

“You don’t think he said it to Ned Stark, I hope?  Of course we were alone.  Us and the children.”  Cersei removed her hairnet and draped it over a bedpost, then shook out her golden curls.  “Perhaps Myrcella sent this man with the dagger, do you think so?”

It was meant as mockery, but she’d cut right to the heart of it, Jamie saw at once.  “Not Myrcella.  Joffrey.”

Cersei frowned.  “Joffrey had no love for Robb Stark, but the younger boy was nothing to him.  He was only a child himself.”

“A child hungry for a pat on the head from the sot you let him believe was his father.”

Learning Joffrey’s motivation actually makes me almost pity him a little, but he was still a twisted psychopath.  Elsewhere in this book, Stannis recalls Joffrey cutting up a pregnant cat and proudly taking the baby carcasses to show Robert.  The kid was not sane.  I’m glad he’s gone.

Random observations:  I loved that Davos learned to read, rescued Edric Storm, and convinced Stannis to take his army north.  I noticed three or four mentions of the phrase “dance with dragons” in this book, and I’m wondering how those mentions will relate to the fifth book.  Melisandre’s prophecy about the stone dragon waking with the blood of a king must refer to Dany’s dragon eggs, which were thought to be stone, but hatched when she burned them on the pyre with Khal (“king”) Drogo’s body.  When Hoster Tully kept mentioning “Tansy” as he died, at first I thought it was a woman he had an affair with, then later I thought it was an illegitimate child of Lysa and Petyr’s that he’d made Lysa give up, but having finished the book I think it was just the herb that he forced Lysa to unknowingly drink, causing a miscarriage of her bastard with Petyr.  When Arya and Gendry are at the brothel with the outlaws, there’s a “red-haired inkeep” named Tansy, so I thought it could be her since Cat is a Tully and has reddish hair, too.  I think it’s just a coincidence, though.  The story Meera relates about the mystery cranogman knight at a tourney is significant, because Jojen kept asking Bran if he was sure his father had never told it to him before.  I think the mystery knight was Meera and Jojen’s father, and the tourney was the one in which Rheagar won and gave the winter roses to Lyana and started that whole war that ended with Robert on the throne.  I wonder if we’ll get to learn more about the role that the Reeds’ father played in all that?

So.  That was pretty much it, the book was incredibly exciting and I had come to the end but for the epilogue.  My heartbeat was starting to calm down.  I was feeling satisfied with what a great read this had been, and ahh, here’s some little tag on the story about a random Frey going to deliver a ransom.

pic of me just reading

Just reading along, la-di-da, only a few pages left…

Suddenly, WTF?!  Catelyn is still alive, or re-alive, like a freaking zombie, like Beric Dondarian was?!?!  But she’s all bloated like a corpse and has her death wounds and stuff?!  WHAT THE EFFFF?!?!?!

pagelady freaks out about re-animated catelyn

ZOMBIE-ISH CATELYN STARK!!!!

And that’s the end.  OF COURSE it’s a cliffhanger, (I should have remembered, plot twists are coming!), and I’m so wound up and can’t wait to start the next one!  Unfortunately, I already know it will be a few weeks before I can start Feast for Crows because I have some other books I need to finish, plus I need my reading schedule cleared on September 27 for J. K. Rowling’s The Casual Vacancy.  But I will return to Westeros as soon as I can!

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Clash of Kings Book Reaction

I actually finished reading Clash of Kings by George R. R. Martin two weeks ago, but I haven’t had a good chance to sit down and compose my thoughts, reactions and predictions until now.  (The beginning of the semester is always a little hectic).  Like it’s predecessor, this book is so long and dense it’s a little overwhelming to dissect, and I’m resigned to the fact that I’ll probably forget to include some crucial plot twist or character dynamic in this post.  Although, my system of marking noteworthy passages was much better organized this time.  I used different colors for characters, quotes, cultural clues, and prophecies:

I have not started reading Storm of Swords yet, because I really wanted to write down what I was thinking and feeling about the series at this point before moving on.  You only get to read something for the first time once.  Also, once I’m caught up to what has been published so far I’ll still have to wait an agonizing few years before the last two books come out, so I might as well savor the journey I have ahead of me.

Characters:

Arya: Still totally love this girl.  She is probably my favorite character so far, (followed closely by Jon Snow with Tyrion in third place).  She is so strong-willed, determined, and smart, and she is probably one of the only one in her family who could endure and survive what she has been through.  I liked that she spent this entire book masquerading as a peasant, too, because every main character is high-born (or at least a bastard raised in privilege) and I was starting to wonder what life must be like for the common people.  Whenever the narrative describes these elaborate, jewel-encrusted outfits that Cersei wears I think, how long did it take some seamstress to make that?  It’s not like they have sewing machines, and they’d have to make or acquire all the fabric and materials, and it would take months or years and that would be their whole life, sewing sewing sewing all day long till their backs and fingers ached.  Or what about these guardsmen, standing around in front of a door all day, loyal to one family and getting killed because of the other families that don’t like the family you serve, and it has nothing to do with you except that you had the misfortune to not be born to a lord.

Arya, aka Nymeria “Nan”, page to Roose Bolton at Harrenhal.

Davos: Davos is so far the closest thing to a lowborn main character.  I mean he actually was lowborn, but now he has a title.  I liked his not-from-privilege perspective and I thought he was honorable, but I wish he would be more concerned with his sons’ futures than just hoping they’ll have higher stations.  He should be instilling some of that code of honor into them–what good will a lordship be if they grow up to be horrible?  They seem foolish and overly enamored with power.  Also, I think it’s kind of funny, but mostly gross, that Davos carries his severed fingertips around with him.  Fingertips: the new rabbit’s foot?  I guess both are pretty morbid.

Theon: I hate Theon.  I hadn’t really thought about him much at all during Game of Thrones, so when I started reading the first chapter from his perspective I was like, “yay, another new p.o.v!”, but two pages in, when I saw what a misogynist pig he is, I was like, NOPE!  Shut it down.  Not fangirling over this jerk.  Then of course I thought it was hilarious when he accidentally hit on his sister.  That’s what you get, Theon, for treating women like crap!  I guess I felt a teeny bit bad for him when he wasn’t accepted by his father the way he thought he would be, but really, he just waltzes in expecting praise and responsibility and he hasn’t really done anything to earn anything.  He’s a spoiled brat, and basically everything he did this book make me continue to dislike him, (hello, taking over Winterfell, fake-killing Bran and Rickon, actual-killing two innocent peasants?!), but when I ranted to my friends that have read ahead of me about how much I hate Theon they said, “he’s confused, he’s torn between his father and Robb!”  I certainly didn’t see any confusion from him in this book, so I’m guessing he must have some more character development to come.  But at this point I really hate him, so if I end up defending or loving him later, it had better be because he does some majorly redemptive rescuing of some other character or something.

Catelyn: I am getting really tired of Mrs. Stark.  For most of her chapters I was wanting to shake her and shout, “Get your ass back to Winterfell!” Her four-year-old misses and needs her desperately, her other son is having to deal with adjusting to life without he use of his legs and she hasn’t even seen him since he was still in a coma!  She doesn’t even act like she cares, she just says “Oh yes I miss my kids at Winterfell but I have to stay here with Robb, he needs me more,” when the truth is she wants to be wherever she thinks she can personally wield the most power and influence.  If she were honest about her ambition I might not find it so annoying, although I would still think she’s a bad mother for abandoning her youngest and most vulnerable children, (and look how that turns out for them, by the way!  Who needs you more now, Cat?!)  I wish we could get Robb p.o.v. chapters instead of Catelyn.

Tyrion: This was totally Tyrion’s book.  I loved seeing how clever he was at the manipulation and diplomacy involved in running a kingdom.  His plans kept falling into place so perfectly that I started worrying about the inevitable downfall when everything would come crashing down.  I really thought something bad was going to happen to Shae, and I guess it still might.  I’m extremely curious to see what becomes of Tyrion now that his father has returned to take over the job of Hand of the King.  I was cheering for him when he rode out into batle, though.   Poor guy, getting his face cut up, like he needed another physical deformity!  Tyrion definitely creept up the list of my favorite characters during this book.  I want to see him get married and have kids–he would be such a good dad!  And I want him to be happy.

Daenerys: I’ve decided that Dany’s chapters are primarily interesting for the cultural descriptions, (of the Dothraki, Qarth, the merchant shipyard, etc.), but not so much for her character.  Maybe she will grow to be more compelling later, but for now I’m like, “Hey cool, you have dragons!  And…not much else.”

Bran: I tend to forget about Bran until I get to one of his chapters, and then I remember that I totally love him and feel bad that I’d forgotten about him.  I was so proud of the way he carried the responsibilities of Winterfell lordship in his mother and older brother’s absence.  I’m heartbroken for his broken legs and broken dreams of fighting and becoming and knight, and I’m loving this whole wolf-warg business, mostly because he still gets to experience running and moving independently that way.  When Jojen said Bran was the winged wolf who would never fly, I started to worry that Bran wouldn’t survive to the end of the book, and I almost held my breath from the time Theon put those decapitated heads up to the time it was revealed they weren’t really Bran and Rickon.  Maybe, (hopefully), Jojen’s vision just meant that Bran would never walk again.  (Please don’t die, Bran!)  I do wonder, if Bran wargs into Summer’s brain right before he died, would he continue to live on in the wolf form?  It seems like that’s what happened to the wildling guard Jon killed towards the end:

On a rock above them, the eagle flapped its wings and split the air with a scream of fury.

“The bird hates you, Jon Snow,” said Ygritte.  “And well he might.  He was a man, before you killed him.”

Jon: Speaking of Jon, who discovered in this book that he, too can warg into his direwolf, he continues to make me say “awww!” in a high, adoring/pitying pitch when I read about his bravery, loyalty, and noble character.  His is a difficult path.  When Mormont needled him about his brother being King while Jon could never leave the Watch, I loved his response:

“What will you do?” Mormont asked, “Bastard as you are?”

“Be troubled,” said Jon, “and keep my vows.”

I love Jon’s sword, Claw.  I know he got it in the last book, but I think I forgot to mention it in my previous post.  I still love his friendship with Sam, and I know that even if all the other watchmen believe Jon has betrayed them, Sam will always believe he’s still loyal.   (I really love Sam, too.  I love how gentle and well-meaning he is, telling Gilly that surely Jon can help her, teaching his ravens how to talk).  I loved that Jon spared Ygritte, and that his squad leader probably based his decision to give Jon the most difficult mission of joining the wildlings in part based on that act, (my conjecture).  When Jon asks why he was commanded to kill the girl, Qhorin say:

“I did not command it.  I told you to do what needed to be done, and left you to decide what that would be.”  Qhorin stood and slid his longsword back into its scabbard.  “When I want a mountain scaled, I call Stonesnake.  Should I need to put an arrow through the eye of some foe across a windy battlefield, I summon Squire Dalbridge.  Ebben can make any man give up his secrets.  To lead men you must know them, Jon Snow.  I know more of you now than I did this morning.”

I’m still sticking to my theory about Jon’s real parents, but I put this book’s revelations on that front below in the Prophecies and Predictions section.

Sansa: I liked Sansa better in this book than Game of Thrones, because she finally realized the Lanniester suck and started acting more like a Stark.  Too late, of course, because she’s trapped there now, but at least she’s wishing she wasn’t.  That’s an improvement.  And I like that she is resistant but still a lady–I mean, she has to keep dressing fancily and making appearances and keeping proper court manners, but not everybody would be able to carry on and maintain composure in that situation.  She isn’t a warrior like her sister, but she does poses great strength, and I like the contrast between the two forms of strong females.  I also love her “Florian,” but I’m afraid he’s pretty much worthless, except to keep her hopes alive.   Oh, and poor girl, traumatized by her first period because she’s afraid she’ll have to marry Joffrey, (which she now doesn’t have to do, *phew*), I felt so bad for her, but also laughed a little bit:

“The blood is the seal of your womanhood.  Lady Catelyn might have prepared you.  You’ve had your first flowering, no more.”

Sansa had never felt less flowery.  “My lady mother told me, but I…I thought it would be different.”

“Different how?”

“I don’t know.  Less…less messy, and more magical.”

Sansa becomes a woman.

Jojen Reed: thank goodness, a green-eyed character who is not evil!  I was worried when I read his description that he would be another Lannister-type villain.  Even better-his prophetic visions are called “greensight.”  I’ll take all the posotive green-eyed connotations I can get!  I really like his sister, Meera, too; she is now Arya’s main competition for the character in this series I would most like to be.

Cersei and Jamie and Joffrey Lannister: they still suck.  Carry on.

The Hound: I’m still fluctuating, but I think overall I like him more in this book than I did in Game of Thrones.  His best moment for me in Clash of Kings was when he saved Sansa from the mob.  I also liked when he talks back to Joffrey, and that he refused knighthood.  But what exactly was he planning when he waited in Sansa’s bedchambers?  And why does he seem to be drunk all the time?  I know patricide is awful, but I kind of hope he kills his brother.  Because Gregor “The Mountain” Clegane needs to die, and I think The Hound would get the most catharsis from it.

Jaqen H’ghar: Loved him, by the end, because of the way that he helped my favorite character.  Very intrigued about his background and abilities.  Hopefully we will see more of him.  Valar morghulis.

Hodor: Hodor!  Hodor hodor, hodor hodor.  Hodor?!  Hodor!  Hodor.

Quotes and Cultural Things I Loved:

Winter is coming, and it’s going to be fierce because this summer has lasted:

Ten years, two turns, and sixteen days it lasted, the longest summer in living memory.

We learned a lot more in this book about the religion of The Seven, as well as the Lord of Light and the Drowned God.  We learned a little about the old gods, too, and the children of the forest.  I think I’ll save an analysis of all those religions for a separate post, though, since this one is already pretty long.  I also marked all the different ways people referred to the comet, so I can post about that later too.

These were some of the quotes I liked in this book, with pages numbers from the paperback edition I was reading, (ISBN 978-0-553-57990-1):

“Power resides where men believe it resides.  No more and no less.” -Varys, p. 132

“When we speak of the morrow nothing is ever certain.” -Ser Rodrick, p. 257

“To Winterfell we pledge the faith of Greywater.  Hearth and heart and harvest we yield up to you, my lord.  Our swords and spears and arrows are yours to command.  Grant mercy to our weak, help to our helpless, and justice to all, and we shall never fail you.”  –Jojen and Meera Reed, p. 329

“That’s pretty.”  He remembered Sansa telling him once that he should say that whenever a lady told him her name.  -Jon Snow, p. 370

His stunted legs might make him a comic grotesque at a harvest ball, but this dance he knew. –Tyrion re:playing Cersei’s manipulative games, p. 450

“We can only die.  Why else do we don these black cloaks, but to die in defense of the realm?” -Qhorin, p. 632

Jaqen made me brave again.  he made me a ghost instead of a mouse. -Arya, p. 681

Tears filled Bran’s eyes.  When a man was hurt you took him to a maester, but what could you do when your maester was hurt? -p. 967

WTF Moments:

I mean, Melisandre giving birth to Stannis’ assassin shadow.  That’s the main one.  It’s the only one I can think of right now.  I did not see that coming, at all.  I mean I knew she was up to something sinister but I never would have guessed it would take that form.  It was…a WTF moment.  There is no other way to describe it.

I share your shock and revulsion, Davos.

Prophecies and Predictions:

I’m not really sure what all the visions that Dany saw in the House of the Undying Ones mean, but I marked them all so I could check back later to see if they end up making more sense eventually.  Like, could this one be talking about Ned Stark, whose sigil was the direwolf, who was led like a lamb to his slaughter?

Farther on she came upon a feast of corpses….In a throne above them sat a dead man with the head of a wolf.  He wore an iron crown and held a leg of lamb in one hand as a king might hold a sceptor and his eyes followed Dany with mute appeal.

Then she saw the bit about the Targaryean baby, and that has to be significant somehow because they mention the name of the series, “song of ice and fire.”

Viserys, was her first thought the next time she paused, but a second glance told her otherwise.  The man had her brother’s hair, but he was taller, and his eyes were a dark indigo rather than lilac.  “Aegon,” he said to the woman nursing a newborn babe in a great wooden bed.  “What better name for a king?”

“Will you make a song for him?” the woman asked.

“He has a song,” the man replied.  “He is the prince that was promised, and his is the song of ice and fire.”  He looked up when he said it and his eyes met Dany’s, and it seemed as if he saw her standing there beyond the door.  “There must be one more,” he said, though whether he was speaking to her or the woman in the bed she could not say.  “The dragon has three heads.”  He went to the window seat, picked up a harp, and ran his fingers lightly over its silvery strings.  Sweet sadness filled the room as man and wife and babe faded like the morning mist, only the music lingering behind to speed her on her way.

It seems like its gotta be referring to Rhaegar Targaryean and his firstborn Aegon by his wife Elia of Dorne, but as Ser Jorah says when Dany tells him about the vision,

“If [Aegon] was this prince that was promised, the promise was broken along with his skull when the Lannisters dashed his head against a wall.”

My theory about Rhaegar being Jon Snow’s true father could mean that Jon is actually “the prince that was promised,” but then I’m not sure what the meaning of this vision was.  Did Rhaegar misinterpret a prophecy?  Where did this “promise” come from, anyway?  What is this business of the three heads?  And does the fact that he plays a harp tie him to Ygritte’s tale about Bale the Bard, so is it all just a cycle that keeps repeating and the vision is not meant to represent exactly how it happened?

The tale of Bale the Bard definitely supports my theory about Jon being Rhaegar Targaryen and Lyanna Stark’s son.  The blue winter roses!  They’re everywhere!  In Game of Thrones, Ned kept seeing them in his flashbacks of Lyanna, and she wore a crown of them in her crypt statue, and Rhaegar gave her a boquet of them at that joust before he supposedly kidnapped her.  Well, in the Bard’s tale, (which is called the SONG O’ THE WINTER ROSE, by the way!) Bale sings so beautiful for the then-lord of Winterfell that he is told he can choose his own reward.  Then, in Ygritte’s words:

“All I ask is a flower,” Bael answered, “the fairest flower that blooms in the gardens o’ Winterfell.

Now as it happened the winter roses had only then come into bloom, and no flower is so rare nor precious.  So the Stark sent to his glass gardens and commanded that the most beautiful o’ the winter roses be plucked for the singer’s payment.  And so it was done.  But when morning come, the singer had vanished, and so had Lord Brandon’s maiden daughter.  Her bed they found empty, but for the pale blue rose that Bael had left on the pillow where her head had lain.”

The story continues, as the father searches for his daughter to no avail, but a year later she shows up in her room with a baby, and it turns out they were hiding in the crypts beneath Winterfell all along.  (Then the story gets sad and  bloody and I think involves a Bolton ancestor who flays the grown-up baby.)

I’m telling you, these blue winter roses are significant…somehow.

So, similarities to the Rhaegar/Lyanna theory: a Stark maiden is supposedly abducted but might actually love the guy, and has a baby, and blue winter roses are significant.  When I type it out that way it doesn’t sound like such a strong argument, but the roses…the similarities…it’s got to be significant!  When Jon refuses to believe Bael’s story, calling him a liar, Ygritte responds with, “a bard’s truth is different than yours or mine.”  So maybe it won’t be clear what the meaning of these parallels are until later.

But then, we do find out that Bran and his entourage escape Theon Greyjoy by hiding in the crypts of Winterfell, while everyone goes searching far and wide outside the grounds for them!  Just like Bael and the young lady Stark, in the song!

This is totally giving me Battlestar Galactica flashbacks: All of this has happened before, and all of it will happen again!

One last, minor prediction: I think that Varys can warg, possibly into that old cat that has been around King’s Landing forever.  It would make a lot of sense as to how he is able to somehow know everything about everybody else’s business if he spies on them in animal form.  I suspect that cat just because it has been mentioned several times.  They call Varys “the spider” but do spiders even have ears?  If he warged into an insect could he really see very much?  (Although, I guess it worked for Rita Skeeter in Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire!)

How I Felt At The End:

What is to become of my poor Starks, scattered to the winds?  The winds of the WINTER that is coming?!  Arya needs to rip that flayed man emblem off her tunic, because the Boltons are bad news.  As much as I hope she and her small posse make it quickly to Riverrun, I’m afraid the fact that her direwolf Nymeria is still running wild and unaccounted for is prophetic of Arya’s fate to remain separated from her family and on her own.  Jon is with the wildlings now, and had to kill a night’s watch brother to join!  I was so happy when he spared Ygritte, and I hoped she wouldn’t betray him later.  Well, I guess she’s probably part of the reason he’s still alive now, but I’m already worried about how he’s ever going to get back to his brothers, and whether they’ll believe he didn’t really betray them, and I’m worried about how lonely he’s going to be, unable to really trust anyone.  What’s going to happen to Bran?!  His optimism closes the book, but all I feel is anxiety.  He and Rickon have loyal helpers but they are such small groups, if anyone finds them they are pretty much screwed.  Their biggest protection is their direwolves, but that’s not going to help them if they run into one of the armies wandering around the country!

Writing this post has definitely re-ignited my desperate obsession with this series.  I’m off to start Storm of Swords!  Do NOT spoil it for me!

WINTER IS COMING!!!!  FOR REAL THIS TIME!

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My Reaction to the Book “Game of Thrones”

So.  This book, the first in George R. R. Martin series A Song of Ice and Fire, has been on my to-read list for over a year.  I saw the “first look” in Entertainment Weekly when they started filming the television show adaptation, and I immediately thought “this looks like something I would like.”  But I haven’t seen the show yet, because I wanted to read the books first.  And I kept putting off the books because they are so long, I had other things I wanted to read first, and I knew that once I started I would probably get sucked into a new obsession that would take over my life.  And that is exactly what happened.  I gave it 5 stars, and I am now completely obsessed with this fictional world and its inhabitants,eager to devour thousands more pages.  Four more of the planned seven books are already published, so I’m sure have plenty of glorious plot twists ahead of me.  I can’t wait!

I managed to stay fairly spoiler-free by meticulously avoiding clicking on anything remotely related to the books or show and plugging my ears and humming to myself whenever people around me would talk about it.  My vigilance paid off, because I was able to fully appreciate all the unexpected twists and the roller-coaster emotions that I felt towards the characters throughout the book.  I hope I can stay spoiler-free until I’ve caught up on the series, and I don’t want to ruin it for anybody else, so look away now if you haven’t yet read Game of Thrones!  Because the rest of this post will contain **SPOILERS**!!!

The prose sucked me in immediately. This was my face for the first few chapters, giddy over the incredibly rich detail of this fantasy world and the intrigue of the characters’ relationships.

I’d have to say my favorite character was Lord Eddard “Ned” Stark, but whenever I was reading a chapter from Jon Snow or Arya Stark’s perspective, they were my favorite.  And then towards the end I really fell in love with Robb Stark, too.  And of course I love Bran!  I guess I loved everyone while I was reading from their point of view, but I connected with Catelyn Stark and Daenerys Targaryen the least.  And while I like Tyrion Lannister’s humor and sympathize with his difficult past, he’s a little slimey and morally ambiguous, nothing like the noble Lord Stark.   I like Tyrion best of all the Lannisters, but that’s not saying much.

Oh, the Lannisters.  I knew at the first physical description of Cersei, her brother Jamie, and her son Joffrey that they would be unlikeable, yet another example of the annoying “evil” green eyes stereotype.  This is how they were introduced, promenading into the great hall of Winterfell in a chapter from Jon’s perspective:

His lord father had come first, escorting the queen.  She was as beautiful as men said.  A jeweled tiara gleamed amidst her long golden hair, its emeralds a perfect match for the green in her eyes.

.

Prince Joffrey had his sister’s hair and his mother’s deep green eyes.

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Ser Jamie Lannister was twin to Queen Cersei; tall and golden, with flashing green eyes and a smile that cut like a knife.

There were other clues besides their eye color that the Lannisters weren’t going to be the heroes, but about 30 pages after reading these descriptions and predicting that these particular characters would be especially “bad” somehow, I was proved very, sickeningly correct.  This was my face when I found out about the incestuous relationship between Jamie and Cersei, just before they pushed Bran out the window so he couldn’t tell anyone he had seen them together:

I made the same face when Cersei told Ned that she and Jamie were “one person in two bodies.”  I don’t care if the Targaryens marry siblings too, it’s…sick.

If I had to rank the Lannisters from most evil to most humane, I guess it would be:

  1. Tywin-because of how he treats his family, particularly Tyrion and his wife.  That was awful.
  2. Jamie-because he is a kingslayer, a vow-breaker, an incestuous creep and he pushes Bran out the window.
  3. Joffrey-if he is allowed to rule much longer he’ll surpass Jamie in evil-ness. He hasn’t had as many chances to display his darkness.
  4. Cersei-she’s mean, cheats on her husband (with her brother!) she has it in for Ned, but she doesn’t want to kill him.  She really seems to loves her children.  Unfortunately her children suck, partly because of her.
  5. Tyrion-his main fault is being a loyal Lannister.  And he’s completely self-serving, I think.  He cares more about others than anyone else in his family, but he’ll still do whatever is best for him.

I liked the way the book continually switched between several characters’ point of view; it definitely pulled me deeper into the story because I not only got to understand multiple sides, but at the end of each chapter I immediately wanted to know what happened next for that character, and I’d have to read five or six more chapters before I got back to them.  There are really no good stopping points, there’s no time that you’re not desperate for  at least three storylines to be followed up.  I also really appreciated the narrative choice to shield the reader from witnessing the goriest action; for example, the chapters immediately following King Robert’s death are told from the perspective of Arya and Sansa, and we know that people are being killed and things are very bloody but the only death we witness is of the boy in the barn, and when Sansa walks to the courtroom later she averts her eyes from the bodies strewn about the castle grounds.  Then when Robb is in battle against Jamie Lannister, we’re sitting in the trees with Catelyn, waiting for it to be over.  The violence is there but we’re mostly spared the graphic details.

Learning about the Dothraki language and culture was what I found most interesting about Dany’s chapters; I didn’t really care for the Princess herself.  I mean I feel bad for her, but she’s somehow not as compelling to me.  The Dothraki were fascinating, but I would be terrified to actually meet one.  I wish there were more examples of their language, but I guess that’s something to look forward to when I watch the show.  Linguist David Peterson is the Dothraki consultant for HBO, and as soon as I’m able I’m going to check out his Dothraki website.  My impression of Peterson is that he’s way cooler and nicer than Paul Frommer, the linguist who created Na’vi and Barsoomian.  Frommer comes off in interviews as condescending and uninterested in interacting much with conlang fans or revealing too much about his work, so that he’s always the one who knows the most.  Peterson seems like a fellow enthusiastic language nerd, and he tweeted his agreement with my Dothraki analysis back at me when I said:

That was based on this passage, when Dany eats the heart of a stallion at Vaes Dothrak:

Khalakka dothrae mr’anha!” she proclaimed in her best Dothraki.  A prince rides inside me!  She had practiced the phrase for days with her handmaid Jhiqui.

The oldest of the crones, a bent and shriveled stick of a woman with a single black eye, raised her arms on high.  “Khalakka dothrae!” she shrieked.  The prince is riding!

He is riding!” the other women answered.  “Rakh!  Rakh!  Rakh haj!” they proclaimed.  A boy, a boy, a strong boy.

Speaking of language, I wish there was a pronunciation guide for all these names!  How am I supposed to know which vowel the ‘y’ happens to be representing this time?  My friends that have watched the show keep correcting my pronunciations, and it’s frustrating because English already has a ridiculously inconsistent spelling system and I feel like I’m making reasonable assumptions, then I’m told I’m saying it “wrong.”  I didn’t know Catelyn was “Cat-uh-lihn,” not “Kate-lihn.”  I didn’t know Lysa was “Lai-zuh,” not “Lee-suh.”  I didn’t know Rickon was “Rih-kun,” not “Rai-kan.”

Oh well, maybe pronunciation is to me as needlework is to Arya.  I love Arya, for her spunk, her un-lady-likeness, her courage, her fierceness, for standing up against Joffrey in defense of the butcher’s boy, for.  I love her “dance lessons” with Syrio.  I hope she’s okay in disguise as a boy with Yoren.  I’m not sure I trust Yoren, but it’s better that he found her and is helping hide her than the despicable Lord Varys or the selfish Petyr Baelish.

My feelings for “The Hound” Sandor Clegane, with a tragically burnt face like one of my all-time favorite characters, Prince Zuko, yet a sworn sword to the evil House Lannister, can best be described by this chart:

My feelings towards Sansa fluctuated throughout the book as well.  At first I thought she was just annoying, and rolled my eyes at the prim and boring counterpart to my beloved, wild Arya.  I know she’s just trying to be a “proper” lady and that she wanted Joffrey to like her, but I was so angry when she wouldn’t back up Arya’s version of the confrontation with the Prince.  I guess Sansa paid for it by losing her direwolf, and now she’s paying very dearly for her moment of stupidity when she betrayed her father to the Queen.  I can’t hate her for it though because she’s a child and didn’t know the full situation, and I’m starting to like her a lot better now that she’s realized what a prick Joffrey is and is having fantasies about pushing him off of high towers.  If only she had Arya’s gumption, she might actually do it.

Then there’s Robb.  I think part of the reason it took me longer to become attached to Robb was that there were no chapters told from his perspective.  At the beginning I thought he and Jon were rivals, without realizing they were also close friends, and I sided with Jon so I didn’t care for him as much.  But I started to admire him as he struggled to take on the responsibilities of adulthood and leadership that were thrust upon him so young when he was left in charge of Winterfell.  I wonder which Frey will Robb choose to marry?  Will he even keep that agreement, or will some unforseen twist get him off the hook?  When the royal family visited Winterfell in the beginning, Robb escorted the Princess Mycella and was “grinning like a fool,” so I thought maybe he liked her.  And when Catelyn wondered if her son had ever kissed a girl, I thought maybe he had kissed Mycella.  Was that just a little crush, or will it break his heart to have to choose one of Walder Frey’s grand-daughters to spend his life with instead?

If I try to write a coherent paragraph about why I love Ned Stark it would just dissolve into blubbering.  He’s so noble!  He’s so pure-hearted and honorable!  He’s so good, and fair, and he loves his children so much!  This was my face when he was betrayed by Littlefinger, accused of treason, and imprisoned by the Lannisters:

Worrying about Ned Stark’s fate.

And this was my face when it came to THAT PART.  You know.  The terrible, terrible, gut-wrenching, unfair, dishonorable destruction of the best character in the whole book.  (I told you there would be **SPOILERS**!!)

page 727, in my paperback version.

And then, after I had recovered a bit, I vented my anger at stupid snott-nosed inbred Joffrey making such a stupid, unwise and unfair decision, and being allowed to do so by all the worthless people around him:

Dammit, Joffrey! I hope you are quickly dethroned in the next book.

Jon Snow was my second-favorite character, so now with Ned gone I suppose he is my top favorite.  He’s still young, so  he’s not quite as noble as Ned yet, but I think he will be.  I loved how he helped Samwell Tarly at The Wall, and all the conversations he’s had with the Maester’s there, even when he’s being lectured for his mistakes.  I loved how Sam decided to say his vows to the old gods, with Jon, even though Sam had been raised in the faith of the Seven.  It was another way to indicate a break with his past, that this was a new start, the same way people sometimes change their names when significant events happen, (although I think it was a sign of Sam’s loyalty to Jon more than anything else, and I loved that too).  I loved when his fellow newly-inducted brothers go after the deserting Jon to bring him back.  I love Ghost, (and all the direwolves of course), and the way Jon finds him last of all, alone and outcast like himself.  I just love him!

And, I have a theory about the true parentage of Ned Stark’s supposed bastard.  All throughout the book, Ned refused to talk about who Jon’s mother is, and whenever he mentioned or thought of his dead sister Lyanna, there was some mystery involved.  Her death had something to do with the war that led to Robert’s accession to the throne, but  we still haven’t really been told the whole story of what all happened between them.  But Ned had flashbacks and dreams of Lyanna with blue rose petals, or blood, or both, whispering, “Promise me, Ned.”  When Ned is imprisoned by the Lannisters, he recalls a jousting tournament when he was 18:

Ned remembered the moment when all the smiles died, when Prince Rhaegar Targaryen urged his horse past his own wife, the Dornish princess Elia Martell, to lay the queen of beauty’s laurel in Lyanna’s lap.  He could see it still: a crown of winter roses, blue as frost.

But the clue that really stuck out to me came from Bran, when he goes into the Winterfell crypt with Maester Luwin and Osha and is telling the slave about the Starks who are buried there.  When they come to Lyanna’s tomb, he says:

“Robert was betrothed to marry her, but Prince Rhaegar carried her off and raped her,” Bran explained.  “Robert fought a war to win her back.  He killed Rhaegar on the Trident with his hammer, but Lyanna died and he never got her back at all.”

I don’t think Rhaegar kidnapped Lyanna.  I think they were in love and ran off together.  I think he got her pregnant and she died in childbirth, that Ned was there and the promise he made to his dying sister that still haunts his dreams was to claim her son as his own bastard, to never tell anyone the truth in order to protect the life of her son.  So Jon Snow is really Jon Targaryen, and he resembles Ned because he is half-stark, but Ned is his uncle and not his father!  My friend @maldem, who has read all the books, pointed out to me that the series is called “A Song of Ice and Fire,” and Jon Snow being half Stark and half Targaryen fits it perfectly.  The Starks live in the North, they were the kings of winter.  The Targaryens are the blood of the dragons, and can withstand fire, which Daenarys proves at the end of this book.  Jon burned his hand when he killed the wight that was attacking Mormont, but it healed pretty quickly.  Because he is half Targaryen!

This was my face when I read that final clue from Bran that I needed in that puzzle:

I think I know who Jon Snow’s real parents are!

Speaking of theories, here’s another one I put together that is much more trivial: the one cat that Arya had so much trouble catching once belonged to the former Targaryen Princess.

One by one Arya had chased them down and snatched them up and brought them proudly to Syrio Forel…all but this one, this one-eared black devil of a tomcat.  “That’s the real king of this castle right there,” one of the gold cloaks had told her.  “Older than sin and twice as mean.  One time, the king was feasting the queen’s father, and that black bastard hopped up on the table and snatched a roast quail right out of Lord Tywin’s fingers.  Robert laughed so hard he like to burst.  You stay away from that one, child.”

Later, when Varys visits the imprisoned Ned and tells him that if he does not “confess” to treason, the Lannisters will murder Sansa, the eunuch says,

“Rhaenys was a child too.  Prince Rhaegar’s daughter.  A precious little thing, younger than your girls.  She had a small black kitten she called Balerion, did you know?  I always wondered what happened to him.  Rhaenys liked to pretend he was the true Balerion, the Black Dread of old, but I imagine the Lannisters taught her the difference between a kitten and a dragon quick enough, the day they broke down her door.”

This story is so rich, even the cats have backstories!  I love it.

I still don’t really know much about those creepy zombie-like creatures in the prologue.  It was so scary reading the chapter when Jon was out with the rangers looking at those dead bodies that were starring up with “blue, blue eyes,” and right away I recognized that they were more of the sinister beings.  It was bad timing, because it was late at night, I was home alone and had only a small lamp on at the time.  Fortunately my direkitty was nearby to protect me.

pagelady’s fierce direkitty.

  (That’s another thing I don’t quite understand–what exactly is the connection between the Stark children and their direwolves?  I mean how does that work?  And how did Bran and Rickon have the same prophetic dream about their father?  And how do magic and prophecies work in this world?  Like, was the prophecy about Dany’s son wrong, since he died, or was it true and that means the baby isn’t really dead, but smuggled away somewhere?  Or was it just stillborn and the maegi woman made up that horrific tale about it having scales and wings and disintegrating?

This book is so dense, I could almost be content to read it again instead of reading the next one, just to pick up on all the little things I’m sure I missed.  But I’m also dying to know what’s going to happen to my beloved Stark family next,  and I’m eager to get caught up so I can go join the rest of the fandom online without worrying about avoiding spoilers.  Besides, the last two (of the planned 7) books aren’t published yet, so I can always re-read while we wait for them.

Robb unexpectedly becomes King of the North

I hope you’ve enjoyed the illustrations for this post.  I had to make my own, because I dare not type “game of thrones” or any characters’ names into a google image search, for fear of seeing something that will spoil that books I haven’t read yet.  I’m sure they would still be worth reading, but part of what I love about the first time through a book is making guesses and theories about what’s going to happen, and then finding out if I’m right or not.   For example, I’d  like to think I would have predicted that Dany’s dragon eggs would hatch at some point, but since I had happened to see a picture of that scene from the television show, (where three dragons flit around the shoulders of a silver-haired girl,) I’ll never know if I really would have, or what would have been my definitive clue.

In other words, the Others take you if you leave me a book-two-or-beyond spoiler in the comments!  And here’s a blank template if you want to create your own reaction faces; you just add eyebrows and a mouth.  It’s super fun.

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